Interview with Chairperson Kiyoko Ando
I interviewed Kiyoko Ando, the chairperson who established Parent Support Step.
This interview is based on the content from the initial coverage conducted in May 2021.
The Trigger for Establishment
Please tell us the trigger for the establishment of Step.
Ando
We started with three people who were officers in a "parent association" for children with disabilities.
This "parent association" had become too large, making it impossible to hear the voices of individual parents.
While a large scale can convey messages to the administration, it cannot listen to the individual struggles.
The trigger was the desire to start activities to listen to the voices of each individual, which could not be done in the "parent association".
Basically, we aim to convey what we thought would have been good to have when we were raising our children to the younger parenting generation.
What is it like to be a parent of a child with disabilities?
What kind of people are parents of children with disabilities?
Ando
The parents who come to the Rabbit Café and those we meet when we go out are different types.
The parents who specifically come to the "Rabbit Café" tend to be serious and easily stressed individuals.
They come with a sense of desperation, having trouble finding a place to consult about their children, even though they are extremely nervous.
On the other hand, it can be said that they have the energy to come all the way to the Rabbit Café.
Those who can take action themselves are not as worried. Even if they go through tough times, they can overcome them with appropriate support.
Conversely, the "parents we meet when we go out" are struggling but do not have the energy to come to the Rabbit Café.
These individuals tend to have a higher level of distress.
They may have more complicated issues and may find it difficult to accept advice from others.
Therefore, we believe that just waiting at the Rabbit Café is not enough.
We need to go out to various places and have different approaches to connect with those who are struggling.
We believe it is wrong to recognize only those who come to the Rabbit Café as "parents of children with disabilities".
Consultations at the Rabbit Café
When you receive consultations, do you ever feel down as a result?
Ando
I do not feel down.
However, some people do.
Those who receive consultations may have varying degrees of suitability for it...
When their children are still small, I do not recommend that they engage in similar activities to ours and take on other parents' consultations.
I believe it can only be done when their own children are quite grown.
This is because I think it is a significant burden to take on others' consultations when one is already overwhelmed, and there are still many aspects they do not understand themselves.
After digesting various things, I encourage them to "please do it if you want to".
However, rather than wanting them to engage in activities like ours, I hope that parents of children with disabilities will work in various places in society while having their personal backgrounds as parents of children with disabilities.
This way, when people with disabilities enter society, there will be understanding individuals in various places.
It would be better if the local bakery owner was a parent of a child with disabilities.
It would be good if the department head at the company they work for was a parent of a child with disabilities.
I think that would be better.
Do men (fathers) also come to the Rabbit Café for consultations?
Ando
I think it’s about 2-3% overall.
Many come with their wives or are brought along.
If a father comes alone for a consultation, it’s about 1%.
It’s hard for them to come alone. Since the Rabbit Café is mostly women, it might be difficult for them to come.
That’s why we have the "Rabbit Dining" specifically for fathers.
The staff is also mostly male.
Thanks to that, fathers who usually don’t talk much at the Rabbit Café talk a lot during Rabbit Dining!
I guess it’s hard for them to talk when they are with their wives (laughs).
The Background of "handmade Rabbit"
How did "handmade Rabbit" come to be?
Ando
Among the mothers who use the Rabbit Café, there are many very skilled individuals.
I thought it might be good to gather these people and hold a market at the Rabbit Café.
Since the mothers come to the Rabbit Café for consultations, they tend to feel somewhat apologetic or reserved.
Even if we try to create a more equal relationship by having them pay for food and drinks, there are still parts that are not equal.
I wanted to see them in a different light, showcasing their favorite things and what they enjoy, so we first held a real market.
To my surprise, their faces were truly bright and lively.
Even during the pandemic, many people came, and the interactions were very good.
While the Rabbit Café is a closed space, we opened it up when we held the market.
I had been thinking about how to open the Rabbit Café for a long time, but I hadn’t found the right opportunity.
It is important to protect the space, but it is also important to open it up.
I think both are necessary.
We must never hurt or objectify the mothers, but I believe there are ways to open up while still protecting them.
By opening up, local people can learn that "there are people doing such things here".
At the same time, we must convey to society how important it is to support parents of children with disabilities.
I thought it would be good to have opportunities to convey this not just through writing and photos, but in real spaces.
This experience led to the opening of an online shop.
The online shop provides a clear point of contact for outsiders.
By attaching the STORY of the creators to the product pages, we focused on helping people understand what parenting a child with disabilities is like.
While other people and organizations convey information about children with disabilities, it is our role to convey information about the parents of children with disabilities.
Don't Carry It Alone
Finally, do you have a message?
Ando
The most important thing is not to carry it alone.
This is the essence of it.
If you only think within yourself, you will go in circles and nothing will be resolved.
In today's internet society, I think there are quite a few cases where people create connections by asking questions online.
However, those are not people around your child or yourself.
Moreover, they tend to be focused on the specific information you want.
In the future, as you navigate the challenges of parenting, real help will become absolutely necessary.
I also like the internet, so I’m not denying it, but if you only consult online, it ultimately leads to "carrying it alone".
It is important to connect with people who can actually help and provide consultations.
If they are people around your child or yourself, they can provide an objective perspective.
Then, you will be able to see things from a "objective" viewpoint, and parenting will go in a good direction.
It is also important to involve various people as early as possible in the parenting journey.
At the Rabbit Café, we do not give instructions like "do this, do that".
When you are unsure of what to do, engaging in dialogue with us becomes a place to ultimately internalize and reconcile your thoughts.
By talking, you can realize, "What was bothering me was this" or "I was only thinking about myself...".
I hope that not only at the Rabbit Café but also in general, everyone can have someone to consult with.
Conclusion
The simple yet powerful desire to "help those in need" has built Parent Support Step.
Since its establishment in December 2012, it feels unwavering.
They are constantly thinking about supporting parents of children with disabilities and providing a place for parents, essentially a space to protect them.
Currently, they are focusing on parents of children with disabilities in their early childhood, but they are gradually expanding the scope of support.
Step is creating detailed plans according to needs and is evolving.
I felt that this evolution is what will create a better community.
Data on Certified NPO Parent Support Step
| Name | Certified NPO Parent Support Step |
|---|---|
| Location | 2463-6 Nitta, Kurashiki City, Okayama Prefecture |
| Contact | 086-431-1651 |
| Parking | No Please inquire about parking before visiting |
| Business Hours | Phone reception hours: 10 AM - 6 PM Rabbit Café: 10 AM - 3 PM (Tuesdays and Thursdays only) Individual consultations: Every Tuesday and Thursday afternoon (1 PM and 2 PM for one hour) |
| Regular Holidays | Saturday, Sunday, and public holidays There may be additional holidays |
| Usage Fee (including tax) | Rabbit Café: Cost of food and drinks Individual consultations: Free |
| Payment Methods |
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| Reservation Availability | Rabbit Café: Due to capacity limits during the pandemic, please contact us in advance. Individual consultations: Reservation required |
| Toilet | Western-style toilet |
| Parenting | Diaper changing space available |
| Website | Certified NPO Parent Support Step |
